That was the only time I ever felt so small. I never knew the meaning of that phrase before, “I feel so small...”
Everything in the world seems so big that it might fall upon me and hurt me. Everything seems scary and suffocates me, but I cannot even find a place to hide. I don’t have any self-confidence anymore or self esteem.
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So, there was the Saturday Market happening yesterday early in the morning, in the small town that I live in. I was having Chai and a delicious pretzel with a friend. Then, there was a Dutch guy who was maybe in his mid 40s - we had met elsewhere before, but never talked until he came to our table. We chatted for a bit, but then I needed to join a work Zoom call, so I politely asked if it was ok for me to join the call whilst still having our tea as we had originally planned. They said it was okay.
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As a single female traveler, I was riding a motorbike up in a remote mountain landscape sprinkled with farms and villages. I ended up on a road under construction, which was terrible. It was close to dusk and there was no reasonable option other than to push through, even if my anxiety was growing exponentially. There was a guy driving in front of me who recognized my dilemma and signed that I should follow his lead.
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I have been body shamed since I was young, even when people were not using that term yet. Maybe people didn’t know better. But my youth was destroyed by words - the words that people said to me without even knowing themselves.
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Ko Maung Maung’s wife, Ma Seinn, sends the girl from his office something to eat almost twice a week. She does this not only to build a good relationship with them, but also to check on what her husband, Ko Mg Mg, is doing or is planning to do. They usually talk on the phone too.
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